在上一篇文章中，我们先为各位考生讲了两种在雅思写作开篇容易犯的错误，下面，我们继续来看在雅思写作开篇考生们容易犯的其他错误，希望考生们能及时改正~

　　问题三：似是而非

　　还有一些同学在使用雅思写作词汇时不注意区分不同词汇在含义上的细微差别，笼统地归为“同义词”进行混用。虽然有些词汇在使用中存在“交集”，但并不意味着在任何场合都可以无条件替换。

　　Writing Topic 3:Developments in technology are causing many environmental problems. Some people think that people should choose a simpler way of life. Others think that we should use technology to solve these problems. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. (2015.05.09)

　　雅思写作题干理解：科技进步造成了环境问题。有人认为应该简单生活(少用科技)，而其他人认为应该用科技来解决环境问题。讨论双方观点，给出自己的意见。

　　学生习作：Nowadays, an increasing number of people are concerning about growing environmental issues resulted from the application of modern technology. However, whether we should continue to utilize the technology has caused a heated debate. My view is that to exploit new technology has its weakness but its importance should not be denied.

　　评论：concern作为动词表示“关心、关注”使用时往往以被动式出现，即be concerned with/about。issue是一个中性的词，可以是好事也可以是坏事。用在这里不能清晰表达problem的负面含义。有些同学可能会用dilemma来替换problem, 殊不知前者指的是“进退两难的境地”，并不能与environmental搭配。作者用application, utilize等词简单地替换了use(使用)，但是无法突出“过度使用”科技所带来的后果。Weakness的含义过于笼统，并不能清楚交代科技所带来的问题具体是什么。deny表示“矢口否认”，“不承认”的意思。而作者想表达的意思应该是ignore, neglect(忽视，忽略)。由此可见，很多同学对一些雅思写作“熟词”词义掌握得不够精准，导致南辕北辙。

　　修改过后：Nowadays, an increasing number of people are concerned about the growing threat posed by the abuse of modern technology. The issue of whether we should continue to rely on technology to ease the situation has been frequently raised in public and scholarly discourses. My view is that despite of the harms caused by modern technology, we should never overlook its importance in exploiting new energies and securing ecosystems around the world.

　　再评论：problem可以替换成threat, danger, damage, 后面加过去分词进行修饰：brought by, caused by, posed by(由……所带来、导致的)。abuse表示“滥用”，这个词增加了表达的严谨性。潜台词是：合理使用科技不会带来这些问题。ease the situation这一指代巧妙地避开了solve environmental problem这个重复出现的关键词，使行文更简练。public and scholarly discourses是比较正式的表达，需要根据雅思写作题目类型酌情使用。despite of表示让步，体现观点的辩证性。最后提出自己的观点，即雅思写作全文核心论点时，将讨论范围明确固定在new energies和ecosystem范围内，既使观点更加清晰具体，又为下文主题段展开做好了铺垫。另外注意动词exploit与secure的动宾搭配。

　　问题四：恣意妄为

　　Writing Topic 4:Some think that developing countries should invite large foreign companies to open offices and factories to foster their economies. Others think these countries should keep large companies out and develop their own ones instead. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

　　雅思写作题干理解：有些人认为发展中国家应该引进外国公司来繁荣经济，其他人认为应该排斥外国公司发展自己的企业。讨论双方观点，给出自己的意见。

　　学生习作：With the implementation of “opening-up policy”, the question whether the countries with economic deficiencies should grant permissions and licences to foreign macrocephalic enterprises to develop their economies by establishing manufacturers and overseas franchises in their territory has been asked by the mass. Although the authorities can be fortified from the foreign companies, we cannot overlook the devastating effect of it. On the contrary, the dissidents suggest that only by renaissance of their national economy without inviting the help from the foreigners can they succeed.

　　评论：该同学的雅思写作词汇量不容小觑，但是这些“华丽”的辞藻却经不起推敲。Implementation与policy的搭配让人如鲠在喉。deficiencies指(营养)缺乏或者先天不足(痴呆儿)而非经济落后。permissions, licences都在表达同样的意思：允许。macrocephalic这词连本土人士也很少使用。manufacturer指生产商而不是工厂，franchise是授权代理而不是分支机构。territory是国家领土(政治称谓)，authorities是政府，这两个都不能替换国家，更不能be fortified(加固防御)。devastating是毁灭性的，到达最严重的程度。dissidents是政治异见人士，而非反对者。renaissance是文艺复兴，浴火重生。invite好朋友可以，但是怎么能“邀请帮助”呢?可见，一段看似“才华横溢”的雅思写作开头，实则漏洞百出，让人啼笑皆非。对于这些“有词就是任性”的同学，应该鼓励他们回归语言的本质，多一份真诚，少一份浮夸。

　　通过以上四个例子，我们可以感受到词汇替换对于雅思写作开篇的重要意义。如果没有大量的替换词、替换结构的积累，开头的几句话很可能就成为考生的“坟场”。当你搜肠刮肚、寻章摘句却又欲言又止的时候，别别扭扭地刚把雅思写作开头段写完的时候，成竹在胸的考生早已洋洋洒洒百十字，坐拥半壁江山了。而接下来故事也毫无悬念了：40分钟过得很快——写得很纠结，而且没写完。所谓功夫花在平时：一点一滴的积累，一丝不苟的态度，才是提高语言水平的唯一途径。对于基础较好，词汇较充足的同学，一定要注意“大词”“难词”的陷阱。越是生僻的词汇，使用的范围也就越有限。如果不能精准把握词义，还不如换一个“低端”但是更“保险”的词汇。准确永远是语言表达的底线。词汇使用的最高境界是用最简单、朴实的词汇表达最贴切的含义。

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